All I Want For Christmas...

Previously on Self-made Motherhood Blog...

I was freaked out and hugely disappointed to learn that it is illegal for me and my unmarried self to get fertility/conception assistance from any doctor in Hong Kong. For realsies. Check out the ordinance. But i picked myself up, dusted myself off, and was prepared to start all over again by planning an IUI with a major Boston hospital's fertility centre. Short story - here's how that all went:
Me: Hi, I'm single and TTC with frozen/thawed donor sperm and want to do an IUI w/your facility in December. How do I make that happen?

Them: Log on to our patient interface site and upload all your medical records pertaining to your previous fertility treatment.

Me: I haven't had any previous fertility treatment. I've only TTC'd twice. With frozen/thawed donor sperm. At home. So it's not exactly proven (or even suggested at this point) that I have any fertility issues. I just would rather do an IUI this time around to boost my chances since I won't have an opportunity for another year or more. I can't get assistance in Hong Kong because I'm unmarried, so it's against the law.

Them: Oh, okay. Well then just send us all of your medical records pertaining to your previous fertility treatment. Or have your doctor in Hong Kong send your records via the interface site, or by fax.

Me: Oh, um...I think I may have already mentioned this all several times before, but I haven't had any previous fertility treatment. I've only TTC'd twice. With frozen/thawed donor sperm. At home. So it's not exactly proven (or even suggested at this point) that I have any fertility issues. I just would rather do an IUI this time around to boost my chances since I won't have an opportunity for another year or more. I can't get assistance in Hong Kong because I'm unmarried, so it's against the law.

Them: Oh, I see. Well then, we'll have to run all your labs and testing when you get here.
Me: What kind of labs? I do have some standard bloodwork from my primary care physician in NYC, and also my most recent pap and STI screening. I could have all that sent over to you...

Them: No, we'll have to run the tests here.

Me: Well, I won't have insurance in the US when I come. Could you at least tell me how much any/all of this is going to cost?

Them: Hi *S. I'm a totally different person than who you've been corresponding with. I run the IVF clinic here. I'll just need all your previous medical records from your previous fertility treatment to assess your situation.

Me: Right...well, as I mentioned already...several times to the person before, I haven't had any previous fertility treatment. I've only TTC'd twice. With frozen/thawed donor sperm. At home. So it's not exactly proven (or even suggested at this point) that I have any fertility issues. I just would rather do an IUI this time around to boost my chances since I won't have an opportunity for another year or more. I can't get assistance in Hong Kong because I'm unmarried, so it's against the law. Also, how much is this all going to cost?

Them: Oh, I see. Well, the initial consult is $674. One day IUI is $891, and two-day IUI is $1782.

Them again: Hi *S. I'm a different different person than the last two people you've been in contact with. I handle financial services for the IVF clinic. Okay, so if you're doing unmedicated or Clomid cycle, it's $761. If you're using injectables, then it's $2,684.88.

Them again: Did you get our last e-mail? You'll also have to have an initial consultation which will cost $674. And from there we can determine what labs/tests will have to be run. This will increase your initial cost of treatment. Any questions?

Now picture me huddled up in front of my laptop reading this last message, rocking back and forth in the fetal position. And....scene.

So after an appropriate amount of freak out time, I did what any self-respecting nerd would do: I went back to some hardcore research. I remembered reading somewhere that someone had done their IUI at home, but it turned out her best friend was a nurse, so the nurse friend learned the procedure and did it for her at home. BUT, someone else had done it at home with a midwife. So I started researching Boston+Midwife+IUI.

After a lot of sorting of procedures and services, and mapping of distances, I came down to two places. 1. Midwives at Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge (MAMAH). 2. Alternative Insemination Center of Greater Boston (AICGB) in Arlington. I sent out a preliminary e-mail to MAMAH. AICGB didn't have an e-mail. Only a contact number. And since I hadn't yet figured out how to dial internationally on my cheapie rechargeable HK SIM card, I let it rest for a minute. A minute lasted exactly two days. I'd e-mailed over the weekend, so when I didn't hear anything back by Tuesday night (Hong Kong time), I figured out my SIM card dialing situation and called MAMAH. I explained my situation (living in HK, in Boston in December, want to try IUI). The person in charge was in a meeting, but the person I spoke to answered a bunch of my questions and told me that they do IUI only at their Arlington branch, and gave me the number to call to talk to someone directly there. Check this out: they charge $163 for the initial consultation, and then it's $190 per IUI. What were they charging me for at the mega hospital? Bureaucracy?!?!

So, just as I was about to dial MAMAH's Arlington branch, I looked down at my notes and realised that it was the same phone number I had for AICGB. Apparently, they used to be separate, but now they were merged. Well then!

In the interim, I've been e-mailing back and forth with a coordinator there. She's been fabulous and very attentive. She thinks it's awesome that I'm going for it in December. And she's taken my family medical history via e-mail and says my initial consult will be pretty short since we're getting most of this stuff out of the way in advance. I e-mailed scans of whatever medical records I do have and also PDF's of my charts from FertilityFriend.com. She said since I had all my physical exams, pap, and STI screening done in late December and late January, I won't have to make myself crazy trying to get it all done again. I just has to be within a year of IUI. And I come in just a few weeks under the wire. YAY! I am missing tests for Rubella, Varicella, Hepatitis C, and CMV. So i need to sort those out before I come.

In other Hong Kong awesome/kinda weird news: I signed up for Groupon HK, and found this in my inbox recently. It includes FSH, LH, and Prolactin levels testing (which I've never had checked before, but are good to know about when you're TTC), pap smear, breast exam, breast ultrasound, and pelvic ultrasound. No sh*t! And the cost? Total $888 HKD (approximately $114 USD). So weird! But i figure I should get a new pap before I TTC in December, because if/when I get knocked up, I definitely don't want any unnecessary poking and prodding up in there. Also, if you guys only knew how hard I tried to get a mammogram in NYC before I started TTC. If you don't have major medical insurance AND an already presenting lump, it is impossible to do for free or low cost if you're under 40 years old. Even when I explained that my mother was diagnosed at age 31, and I'm now 35...no dice. I got a lot of: "Well, you should definitely get screened then! But you'll have to pay out of pocket because we only test women over 40 here." Then with a random Groupon, I get a breast ultrasound (which are actually less invasive/uncomfortable/painful and can show abnormalities sooner). And it's a fraction of the price! Mind=Blown

Also, ordered one IUI vial of Bachelor #1 this past week. I'm waiting for a transfer from my HK bank to my US bank to go through (hopefully soon) so that I can order another one. I checked availability, and he currently has less than 10 IUI vials, and also less than 10 ICI vials before he's on hold for quarantine of the next batch again. I think the IUI vials go quicker, so I may have to get an ICI vial and have it prepped at MAMAH when I get there. AND, I have a friend who's going to be TTC with the same donor around the same time, so I'm hoping and praying for Christmas miracles for us both!

Stay tuned...