Something Witty About The Number Eleven Being Lucky (or whatevs...)

Previously on Self-Made Motherhood Blog:  Our heroine received a dud vial full of dead swimmers and then flew across the country to celebrate her birthday before she'd had any time to process.  The birthday celebrationings were stellar, yay for amazing friends on that one.  The next decision upon my return was whether or not to go forward with an insem for the next cycle.  Should I take a break and give myself time to process? Should I switch donors after the dud vial?  Should I switch sperm banks altogether??

Well, I decided to go forward using the same donor from the same bank and hope that lightning doesn't ever strike twice (especially since the home insem discrimination means that I can't even file an official complaint because they only accept those from lab technicians).  It was definitely a risk.  But I decided to do it anyway.  I was pretty committed to staying with MCB (who has time/resources to get all new paperwork done for a new bank, go through that whole process again, and wait until everything clears?).  I contemplated changing donors, but I didn't see any new (or old) donors of African descent that were Open ID.  I discussed it on one of my ttc message boards and one woman reminded me that the Open ID isn't an iron clad guarantee, and that even a previously anonymous donor may decide to disclose his identity to a birth family if asked at a later date.  I looked through a bunch of anonymous donors, but no one that I liked as much as my current donor.  I didn't have time to lose.  I forged ahead.

In light of my early ovulation on my last cycle, I made sure to get my box-o-sperm delivered two days earlier than my usual prediction. This worked out well because I got a smiley face on the digital OPK at 10am on CD11.  That was a Thursday and I was working all day Friday, so the options were to insem CD12 early morning before work (less than 24 hours after my first OPK+) or wait until after work (34-36 hours after the +).  I decided to do it after work.  I kept testing all day CD12 and kept pulling up positives and smiley faces the whole day.  I was able to leave work about an hour early and got home around 6:30pm instead of 7/7:30pm.  Got another smiley face when I got home.  I decided to check my cervix and see what was up.  Overshare:  I tend to get a metric ton of ewcm, so I try to swab some of it away before doing an insem to make a clearer path.  I started having what I think were ovulation pains on my left side, so I did another OPK at 7:30pm and got a negative on the digital and a waning test line on the dip strip.  I started the thawing process and did the insem right away (lots of swimmy swimmers when I checked on the microscope this time).  Afterwards, I put in an Instead cup with a little body temperature Pre-seed in it just in case anything didn't make it in.  I had some more pains on my left side and just lay with my hips/bum elevated for a while.

I had called my RE's office and asked if I might be able to get progesterone support for my at-home insem and was basically told that they won't prescribe me anything because I'm not doing the insem with them and they can't monitor me.  Fine. Whatever. I'll use the cream as usual.  No big deal.  I swear these people are out for money and money alone, and they will invent new ways to part you from it at every turn.  Case in point, just before this cycle, I e-mailed the RE and asked her to sign my medical release form for the sperm bank (it has to be renewed annually, and mine had expired at the end of April).  I'm not doing any cycles with them, but they did all of my fertility testing and latest bloodwork (and reviewed my medical records from elsewhere), so it seemed logical that they could sign off on my being fit for a pregnancy should one occur.  She rang me to tell me that the only way they would sign it is if I paid to meet with their genetic counselor and get genetic screening done for myself AND for my donor, even though I'm using frozen sperm from an accredited bank.  What the fuck kind of bullshit is that???  It's from a sperm bank.  Where they test for all the same genetic markers that the RE wants to test for.  Why do I have to pay extra to have them test a sample that's already been tested and verified?  And would I have to buy a vial just for them to play with??? And naturally, all of this testing would be out-of-pocket because their genetic testing firm is private and not covered by insurance. Fuck. That.  She recommended I get the Rx from my regular ob/gyn.  Luckily, the bank sent this shipment along and then just sent me a reminder to get the release done before ordering again.  But the RE rang me at the last minute to tell me that she couldn't sign the release form because I hadn't agreed to doing the genetic testing.  Yet another reason for me to hate the US healthcare system in general, and the infertility medical establishment in particular.

Anyhoo...I thought for a minute I might skip doing the progesterone cream this time around because it's inconvenient to have to apply it so often throughout the day when I'm working.  But then I didn't want to wonder "what if?" at the end of my cycle, so I've decided to do it.  This time I'm applying 80mg four times per day (6:30am/pm & 12:30pm/am).  I also decided to take 80mg of bromelain from 1-5dpo.  It's derived from pineapple core.  I was reading up about it and discovered it's not just for helping to build your uterine lining for implantation.  It actually contains an enzyme that helps to break down the wall of the corpus luteum once it enters the uterus (assuming that an egg was fertilized and made its way out of the fallopian tube) so that it can more easily attach itself to the uterus and implant.  Sounded like a good idea to me.  I also started taking 400IU of vitamin E during LP (not sure if I should have started it earlier in my cycle or not).  It's also supposed to help prepare the uterus for implantation.  In addition, I'm doing the moxabustion recommended by my acupuncturist when I was living in HK in 2012.  As with most things related to acupuncture and fertility, it's meant to increase blood flow to the uterus.  Other than that, just waiting around trying not to obsess over my body's every little twinge and eating healthy, nourishing foods.

I'm now at 6dpo.  I had a little bit of spotting on 3 & 4dpo (not uncommon after an IUI).  Very light and only when I wiped after going to the bathroom.  I felt a little nauseous from 2-4dpo, but only really felt it on 4dpo because I had to work and function on a busy Monday that day, whereas the first two days was on the weekend and I could just lie down and take a nap if I felt like it (so I did). And it wasn't anything debilitating.  Just uncomfortable.  Woke up to slightly sore breasts this morning (which is one of my chiefest pms sypmtoms), and have been having odd little twinges/discomfort in the general uterus area today, but that's not really conclusive of anything.  We wait.  We wait.  We wait.

Stay tuned...

Version 6.0: Loading....

Previously on Self- made Motherhood Blog....our heroine discovered that she was not, in fact, knocked up (despite some weird physical stuff and what looked like her first possible implantation dip ever).  And so our intrepid mother-in-waiting endeavored to try in her next cycle.

Which brings us to RIGHT NOW! Welcome to the next cycle! I know what you're thinking: "Wow! That  was fast!"  And you're not wrong.  It was fast. Likely due in no small part to my short cycle and clearly inadequate luteal phase which seem to be intent on flushing out anything that may be contemplating sticking around my uterus for nine and a half months or so.  Not cool, guys! Not. Cool.

In an effort to circumvent (or really, more accurately, supersede) my uterine propensity for short luteal phasiness, I bought this stuff >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Progestelle - Progesterone suspended

in coconut oil.

If I were doing an in-clinic IUI, they'd likely prescribe me progesterone in some form (probably suppositories, like when I did the IUI in Thailand) to help lengthen my LP long enough for some implanting to take place and get good and stuck before my period could come and ruin it all.  So, I figured I should probably get in on that this time around. Now, when I was on the suppositories after my Thai IUI, it lengthened my cycle by probably ten days or more, even though I knew I wasn't pregnant (which was even more frustrating) because I was (and still remain) certain that the clinic's protocol was too strict and the timing was a bit off in my case. And since I'm sure my timing on the last one was spot on, but my naturally short LP kept anything from happening, I want to give myself (and my PFC) any little extra chance that I can. We'll see...

I got my first positive OPK for this cycle in the wee hours of CD12. On CD11, I'd actually tested at 10pm with a standard mid-stream and a Clearblue digital and gotten a negative.  But then I was heading to bed around 1am, and I just felt like I should check just in case, and that's when I got the smiley face!  Counting out about 20 hours from there, I figured somewhere around 9-11pm on CD12 would be an ideal first insem slot. CD12 was the Tuesday after the Memorial Day long weekend, so I came straight home from work and started to prep myself for the next day (pre-chop my breakfast smoothie ingredients, water the plants, take a shower) and then prep everything for the insem (slow-thaw the sample, get the syringe & catheter ready, do another set of OPK's to confirm I was still LH surging, place the Instead cup near the bed).  I also had to prep things (except for thawing the sample) for the 2nd insem because I planned to do it early in the morning before going in to work.

I did Insem 6.1 at 9pm on CD12 (followed all the same steps as before), put in the Instead cup right after, and did the "extra step" (*nudge-nudge*wink-wink*).  Then I watched The Lizzie Borden Chronicles and fell asleep.  The next morning, I actually got out of bed when my alarm went off at 5:45am and went out to the kitchen to prep the second sample. While it was in it's tepid thawing bath, I brushed my teeth & washed my face, and removed the Instead cup from the previous night's insem.  I also did another round of OPK's and still came up with the smiley face. All systems go!  Got the swimmers in the syringe and checked a drop on the ovulation microscope t make sure everyone was still alive and swimming (Check!), and retired to the bedroom for Insem 6.2 at 6:25am on CD13.  Put in the instead cup directly after and did the "extra step", then relaxed for about 20 minutes until I had to get ready to head out for work. I went to work and did all the usual things.

Because I'd gotten my first OPK+ at such a late/early hour on CD12, I was a little nervous that I may have done the insems too early or too late (i.e. What if I always LH surge at 1am, but don't know it because I'm asleep and don't find out until I wake up and test in the morning???).  So I did another round of OPK's at 3:30pm.  Unfortunately, I peed on the Clearblue digital before realizing that I'd not pushed the test stick all the way in, so that one was inconclusive; but the standard midstream OPK was still looking like two equal darkness lines to me.  I ran another Clearblue digi at 5pm though, and it came up negative, so my surge was starting to wane.  This gave me some confidence because it means that ovulation had likely happened in the morning and now things were winding down.  I removed the Instead cup at 6pm, and left work and carried on with my evening as usual.  I did another midstream test around 11pm just to see how much lighter the test line was getting.  It was definitely a noticeable difference, so I'm still feeling good about the timing.

And now we wait!  I start using the progesterone oil tomorrow (CD14), twice a day.  We'll see if it helps. I also found the moxibustion set from my HK acupuncturist and I'm going to start doing that nightly as well as it's supposed to help increase bloodflow to the abdomen (couldn't hurt). Fingers crossed, right?

Stay tuned...

A Confluence of Events Part Trois: IUI 1.2

So, when last we spoke, our heroine was gearing up for IUI Day 2.

I got up early to get ready. When I called in to AICGB at 8:30am, I got the weekend answering service. Following the instructions in my welcome packet, I asked them to page the midwife on-call so that I could schedule an IUI for today. The woman on the other end of the line took my number and said the midwife would call me back soon. And she did. While I was brushing my teeth. Her name was Laura and she asked me if I could come in at 10:30am. I said yes. I finished getting myself together and asked Auntie if she'd give me a ride to Wonderland Station. She was eating breakfast, so I made myself some oatmeal with flax and raisins and put it in a container to go. I also packed a baggy with some almonds and cashews and more raisins in case I got hungry between the IUI and getting out to the alternate acupuncture office in Brookline. Which reminded me...I called Karin to let her know what time my appointment was, and made plans to meet her in Brookline at 1pm.

By this time, I knew a ride to Wonderland probably wouldn't cut it. I asked Auntie if she'd mind dropping me closer in/further along on my trek. She took me to the Red Line at South Station. How I love Auntie so! With the extra-transportational push, I was able to get to AICGB by 10:50am. It might have been sooner if I hadn't just missed the bus coming out of Porter St. Station. The next one took forever to come. I called Laura en route, but she didn't pick up, so I left a message.

When I arrived, Laura was there to greet me...and so was Margi!!! Margi, without whom none of this would have been possible. She fielded all my e-mails and answered all of my questions and really made everything fall into place. It was like old home week. Hugs ensued. I may have mentioned my tendency to erode people's boundaries. I'm a hugger. If I like you, you're probably gonna get hugged. Deal with it. Margi had actually come in just to meet me face-to-face and wish me luck. How sweet is that?! After she left, Laura showed me into the exam room and closed the door. I undressed from the waist down (except for my purple fuzzy socks), got up on the exam table, and draped myself with a clean white sheet. I reached over and pulled the chair with my things on it closer, and dug into my bag for my phone - which is really more of an mp3 player on which I send and receive texts and occasionally place calls.

Laura came in and I scoot-scoot-scooted to the edge of the table, trying to relax. I'm not sure if it was me or Laura, but the speculum definitely required more breathe-through on my part this time around. I asked how things were looking. She said, "Good! Like you're ovulating..." The catheter pinched as it went through. It hadn't before. I turned on Adele and worked on relaxing all the muscles in my body, starting with my girl parts. As before, the IUI was over in an instant. Laura suggested something new. Instead of the lay-back-with-a-pillow-under-my-bottom, she had me completely rotate myself on the table so that my bottom was on the elevated incline part, and my head was resting on a pillow on the pull-out extension part. It felt odd, but anything for the cause! I lay there, once again, quietly singing Adele to myself, and my eggs, and the swimmers, and hopefully my future baby for thirty minutes. It's not easy to quietly hold notes in your smallest voice when you're upside down.

Got dressed. Thanked Laura effusively. On to the next step. Acupuncture with Karin. I hadn't been to the Brookline office before. Actually, I can't definitively say I'd ever been to Brookline at all before. I just followed the directions I'd gotten from the MBTA travel planner. Bus to Harvard Station. Then another bus from somewhere in that neighborhood that would take me directly there. First problem, the first bus took forever to come. Second problem, when I got off at Harvard Station, I had no idea where I was. I found the bus stop at last. Oops. No I didn't. I was on the wrong side. After making my way to the right side, the bus actually came pretty quickly. And soon we were on Harvard Street, so I just kept an eye out for the address. 318. We passed it by a block, so I got off and walked back. Didn't look particularly office-like. But my massage place in Brooklyn is the ground floor of a residential brownstone with a modest little shingle out front, so I figured it was just more low-key than the other location. Rang the bell and an unkempt, but very polite college guy came to the door looking as confused as I felt. I said I'd come to see Karin (maybe she worked out of her home on weekends???). He said it was just him and three other guys living there, and before they moved in it was also a bunch of guys, so he didn't really know what to tell me...I confirmed the address. And therein lies the rub...I was at 318 WEST Harvard Street. It was freezing outside, so I walked down the block to a library I'd seen and stepped inside the foyer. I called Karin. I was tired and cold and now lost. I thought I'd call it quits and just go back home the way I'd come. There was no way I was gonna get to her in time. She (much like Laura and Margi) had come in especially for me that day, so now I felt like a total ass. She asked me where I was exactly, and said she'd call me right back. After what I assume was some astute internetting, she figured out that the bus I was on probably did stop at her office if I'd have stayed on. I told her the buses were coming pretty frequently (i.e. I'd just seen one go by as I answered her call, so I figured they were coming about every 10 mins or so). I'd hop back on the bus and head her way, unless I could snag a cab (which I didn't think likely in this neighborhood). But just as I was crossing the street to the bus stop, a cab came down the street and I flagged him down. There was a lot of traffic on Harvard Street once we finally got there, but we got there and that's the main point.

I paid him and thanked him for picking me up and hurried upstairs to meet Karin. I rather like the Brookline office. It's in a "wellness studio" that also has yoga, pilates, and other stuff. But today it was just Karin and me. I apologized for being late (I think. I hope I did...It seems like the sort of thing I would do in that situation). She was super nice about it. After a quick trip to the bathroom, I was ready to surrender myself to a rigorous poke-a-thon of relaxticity. Yes, I made up both of those words. She also did some moxibustion, which I'd never had done before. Good stuff. Overall, I think it was a really good session. She knew I was heading for New York the next day, but we planned another session for the day after I got back. I paid. Said goodbye. Hugged. And off home back to Autie's...this time via the Green Line which was just down the block and so much quicker than the bus.

And now, we wait...

Stay tuned...